Official Post#1

Woooow hellooo!! Of course Im just helloing myself because nobody read this blog except MEEEEE! (okay this is sad). Well anywaaay, Im in my semester break. Which means I have 2 weeks OFF, which is VERY RARE, which is why Im extremely HAPPY for. Alhamdulillah :)

One thing interesting is that I just cut my hair. Short. The shortest I've ever been in my life (please exclude baby and toddler times). I used to have supeeeeeer long hair, and do high ponytails, now my hair is a good 5cm above my shoulders and I cant do ponytails anymore. Hehe. Weird actually, but it feels nice. No, its not that Im declaring that I look nice; but, change is nice. I remember I was afraid of changes. I was afraid to change not only my hair, but anything, the way I dressed, my interests, my peers.. Everything. Because I thought, when somebody changed,then people will judge. I respect criticism, but I dont like to be judged. Its frustrating and hard to accept.

 

So there was those times, when I was afraid to make even the tiniest change, because I dont like people look at me different. I was happy though, I thought I felt secure, comfortable with my self. but then, when I was asked to describe my self, I couldnt do it. Because the things I do, were not the things I like to do, but were the things I usually do and I thought I like it. When the truth actually is I know so little about other things around my self, because i was afraid so I never try them. So then, I changed a little bit, I tried things I never done before (believe me its not drugs,smoking or anything weirrd I promise), I make friends outside of my usual type of friends, and got myself more confidence to venture outside my comfort zone. It was nerve wrecking! But its fun actually, I get to know things better, and even more I know myself better.

But then reality hit me, there were moments when people talked stuff about me. "She's changed, she's different now... and yada yada". It was stressful, because you felt like you learned so much from the experience, but somehow people saw it differently. People saw it like I was turning bad or something.I tried to take the talking from two different perspective, yes I understood maybe some people were surprised, or afraid that I might gone too far, turning into a person 180 degrees different from what they know... But hey we're young, we grow and we mature into adults. And for me change is a chance to become wiser, to know your passion, to make better choices in the future and basically its a life-learning process. Sure, we all done stupid decisions, but we'll achieve more because we learned from it. The good or the bad things that you've been through its what makes up who you are today. 

At the end of the day, I took people words as a guidance and remainder, but I dont let them judge or define me for something superficial. So go change! (for the better ofcourse). Dont worry,because no one knows you better than yourself :)

SOOOOO... enough nonsense talking. I am still verrry excited because of my 2 weeks off, its hard to imagine going back to campus right now. I LOVE my morning lazy time. Got up at around 8.30, read morning papers, watch weird music shows (Dahsyat and Inbox hoahaha), brunch (usually indomie), then maybe sleep for a llittle bit more ;) So im gonna enjoy this while it last :D

BYE!

p.s: Please someone help me design my stupid blog... :"(